Goodbye 2017, hello 2018!
I may be a little late to the party, the new year started almost a month ago already. Not much changes when the year does, time continues to move with or without you.
It’s no secret that I was excited to share the news I’d be participating in Blogmas 2017. I was excited about it being my first year blogging, and to be jumping back into the blogging routine in general. It’s also no secret that I haven’t been following through with many of my plans lately. I’ve been slacking so to speak. Yes, sometimes I’m away but you can always expect me to come back.
2017 has been full of surprises, highs, and lows. The lows have overwhelmingly taken over and have left me completely drained, feeling I’ve hit rock bottom.
The highs, however, have made me realize that I am strong enough to get through the obstacles life chooses to send my way, no matter how difficult at first.
The most important lessons I learned:
1. Not to let my emotions consume and control me
2. Be more disciplined and independent
3. Let go of people/things/energies that are holding me back from prospering
Essentially, these are things I already knew but didn’t really apply to my life until forced to. The universe or God will always find a way to force your attention on what’s important that you’re ignoring.
Every time I have backed out of something has been the result of me letting my emotions or things I can’t control get the best of me and shut me down. That is what happened with my participation in Blogmas. I let outside stress and my feelings about certain situations shut me down.
I feel guilty breaking the commitment which is why I stayed away longer. This seems to happen each time but more so now than ever before. Each day that passed made me less motivated and discouraged to come back with another story yet again. There’s also that fear of losing readers that I’m sure we all know about. But I’m human, I can’t be perfect and sometimes things aren’t going to go the way I’d like them too. What can I do? Be upset about it and get into a negative funk, or accept it and move forward.
Now that I am a bit recharged I know to address the situation instead of avoiding it, addressing it early on could have given me the inspiration and motivation I lacked. I also wouldn’t be worried about getting this post out now because it would have already been out of the way. I have to push forward in whatever way that may mean. Even if that means doing something right then and there or taking a break longer than expected, to think and recharge.
Taking the time to think and recharge doesn’t mean to just lay around and binge watch Netflix series or wallow in self-pity. It doesn’t mean to get lazy by any means. Though this free time is definitely needed, you can still be productive while waiting for that inspiration and drive to kick back in. I’ve been doing this by taking time away from blogging but doing work behind the scenes. Continuing to write down or plan any blog post ideas I want to share in the future, working on my focus for social media, taking the time to do research and improve certain skills, try new things, and taking the time to really focus on myself and my vision. What it is that I really want out of this, what it is that I really want out of life period and how I can get it step by step.
Losing my first apartment, my mind, and a relationship all at once forced me to realize I need to become more disciplined and independent. I’ve been moving around from house to house and having to ask for things. There were some people I only let stick around, with power over me in a sense because I was depending on them in some way whether it be financially or emotionally. I put their needs before my own because I felt like I owed them…
If someone is going to walk all over you trying to have power over you just because they’re helping you out, you don’t owe them much of anything. You owe it to yourself to get the hell out of that situation so you can do those things for yourself. That’s just how I feel.
I am now in the process of moving again, which isn’t fun but this next step could be the step I have been needing. I have the opportunity to move a bit further than usual and really get a fresh start where I won’t have to worry about some of the things that have been holding me back here. Though I haven’t quite made up my mind yet, I’ve been thinking of the all the reasons to stay where I am, I do know that I don’t know how things could go if I don’t give it a try. To move forward, you cant stay stuck in the past or even the present. There’s always room to improve. Now is not the time to give up because I feel that much closer to whatever it is I have been searching for. Now is the time to be more optimistic and adventurous. It’s time to plant the seeds and water my ideas. It’s time to do what’s best for me and flourish. 🌻
Changes and new posts are on the way.✨