Short Story Saturday: The Beauty in Lyric✨

The Beauty In Lyric 

Lyric Wright was 7 years old when she fell in love with writing and singing. She wrote her very first song for the school talent show competition and won 1st place.

🎶One day I will fly, I won’t have to cry, mom and dad will always be by my side but I just have totry, to be a big girl sometimes. Cause I can change the world, even if I’m just a little girl. As long as I’ve got super girl powers I can fly forever.”🎶 She sang softly in front of the crowd of parents, students, and teachers.

Fast forward 10 years later and she hasn’t stopped singing since. It became her dream to become a singer/songwriter, she was just too afraid to turn that dream into reality. She had always been very shy and reserved, so her talents were hidden from the world.
She always wondered whatgave her the strength and courage to go on stage when she was 7 and why she didn’t have it now. Her theory: Children don’t gossip and judge each other as much as teenagers. They literally just want to have fun. Teenagers want to start drama, make fun of you, and pullyou down to your lowest level of life all to fit in and make themselves feel better. Especially if you’re really good looking or talented.

She didn’t have many friends so She didn’t want any unnecessary attention on herself just becauseShe was good at something. Isn’t everyone? She didn’t think she was better than anyone else. Unfortunately, the students at Northwood would think that.

The one friend she did have was Connor and even he didn’t knowshe could sing. They met in Math class in 8th grade when he noticed she was struggling on a few tests. He offered to help her and she accepted with the sweetest smile. They were almost inseparable, people often spread rumors that they were secretly dating even when they constantly told them they were just friends. Connor knew she could write well. He learned that in 8th grade when they became friends. He helped her in math and she helped him with his language arts work. They’re seniors in high school now and still do the same only now it’s calculus and English. They were the perfect duo.

One afternoon after school, Connor stops by Lyric’s house as he often did just to hang out or to study sometimes. Lyric’s motherwelcomes him in and tells him Lyric is in her bedroom.
When he gets to her door it’s cracked and he hears soft singing. It’s her. She can’t hear because she has headphones on and she doesn’t see him because she’s focused on writing.

Connor listens to her sing and watches her write in a purple notebook for about aminute before she stops and takes the headphones off.

He decides to knock before walking in.

Connor: Hey, what you up to?

Lyric: Con! You scared me. Are we studying tonight?

She asks as she quickly closes the purple notebook.

Connor: You know I hate when you call me Con. Like I’m some con artist.
He says as he walks over to sit at the computer desk next to her bed.

Lyric: Oh shut up its cute for your name. Are we studyingtonight or?

Connor: No, I’m just stopping by to hang. What are you up to? You didn’t say.

Lyric: Oh I was just writing. Nothing important. What do you wanna do? My mom got a few movies on bootleg and she says they’re all new, but I haven’t checked them out yet.

Connor: Nah I don’t really feel like watching any movies right now. What you listening to?

Lyric: I was just checking out this new song.

Connor: By who?

Lyric: Um, Rihanna. Whyall the questions?

Connor: Rihanna doesn’t have a new song out and I’m asking because I heard you singing and now I’m wondering why you never told me you could. You’ve got some talent and you’re hiding it like this?

Lyric was astounded. She really didn’t know what to say. No one has heard her sing since the 2nd grade in that talent show. She knew he was only going topressure her to sing more but she just wasn’t ready.

Lyric: I was going to tell you eventually. I mean it’s really not that special it’s just something I like to do.

Connor: it’s something you’re really good at.

Lyric: That’s partly why I keep it secret. You know how people at Northwood are. They’ll think I’m some conceited bitch in a second.

Connor: Or they’ll think you sound great, like I do. Does your mom know?

Lyric: She heard me sing once when I was younger, I wasn’t as good back then though. But you’re different.

Connor: The only difference is I’m your friend and I’m gonna tell you the truth. You shouldn’t care what others think. They’re the snobs If they think that of you because you’re the sweetest girl I know. I think you should try out for that new show Musical Wars. You sing and write lyrics on the show to win 50k and a record deal with Next Star Music Productions. All you have to do is send a video with your information and sing a song for 30 seconds.

Lyric: Yeah I bet a million people audition for those shows. What are the odds of me winning or even being chosen?

Connor: Your name is Lyric Wright. I think that’s enough reason itself. Your name automatically makes you sound like a star. A lyrical singing genius. Honestly Lyric, you have a great voice from what I heard.

Lyric: I don’t even know what I would sing.
Connor: Sing anything. What about that Rihanna song you said you were listening to?

Lyric: Haha very funny… I was listening to something I wrote in 2nd grade for a talent show. It’s stupid. But I wanted towrite a full version. Maybe even a better version. I don’t know.

Connor: Can you sing it again for me?

Lyric: Promise not to laugh?

Connor: I’m not gonna laugh. I promise.

Lyric: Okay. I’ve been working on it but don’t look at me…

Connor turns around and patiently waits.
She takes a deep breath, and begins to sing…

🎶Born with wings but they seem that they’ve been broken. Trying to read life like a book but it won’t open. How is the story told? How does the story unfold? Is there always a happy ending? I’m just hanging on the branches. One day I will fly, I won’t have to cry, you’ll always be by my side but I just have to try, to be a big girl sometimes. Cause I can changethe world, even if I was still just a little girl. As long as I’ve got super girl powers I can fly forever.🎶

Connor turns back around when he realizes she is finished. She’s just staring at him, waiting for a response probably.

Connor: It’s a beautiful song. It’s nowhere near stupid. How could you ever think that?
Lyric: I don’t know. You really like it?

Connor: I do. I think you should sing it for the audition. I’m pretty confident you’ll be picked. The worst thing that can happen is you don’t get picked and the best thing that can happen is your life changing forever. You have a real talent you’re clearly passionate about. I can tell by your lyrics. This is the time for you to fly. Your wings aren’t broken they just don’t know how to work because you don’t use them. This could be your happy ending, but only if you try. Give it a chance.

Lyric thought about her bestfriends words and he was right. Those words touched her heart in ways she couldn’t explain but she knew that if she didn’t try now, she probably never would. After a few minutes of deliberation, and non stop “do it! do it! chanting from Conner, she decides to send in her audition with Connors help recording.

6 months later…
audience stage

Lyric: I wouldn’t be here tonight, standing here in front of you all as a Musical War winner if it wasn’t for my best friend Connor. He’s the one who convinced me to take a chance and reach for my dreams. He’s the one who convinced me not to worry about what everyone else thinks and just go for what makes me happy. I couldn’t ask for a better friend so thank you Connor. I’d also like to thank everyone for voting for me, my parents, students at Northwood High School. I really didn’t expect all the love and support I got. I’ve learned how to use my wings and I’m flying! Thank you everyone!❤️

Lyric’s life was changed forever, for the better.

I hope you all enjoyed this short story. All stories I have shared are drafts. Let me know your thoughts or what you took from it in the comments.

I remember when I first wrote this short story and a few of you said you really liked the lyrics, and even the story. I thought about finishing the lyrics making a full song, and continuing Lyric and Connors story. Unfortunately I forgot about this because I constantly have so many ideas roaming through my head. Now that I’ve read it again I’m feeling quite inspired to get started on that! It all comes at the right time…



We Finally Got A Car!?!?!

Earlier this week I mentioned I would have a few more updates to share. It seems like so much keeps happening and coming up in life but I’m not going to allow things to stop and shut me down anymore. When things overwhelm me, I no longer quit. I’ll just take a break. I have a story to share with you all and then I will be sharing the updates in a separate post. I also have the last feature to do today so I will be posting 3x. Stay tuned.
Let’s get into the story…

At the end of May, my boyfriend and I lost our car. We had just moved into our apartment a couple of months earlier and it was becoming harder to keep up with all of the bills. We made sure to keep paying rent because that was more important than the car. The last car payment we missed we got the car taken away. They took it while my boyfriend was at work on a Thursday, when he got paid the next day. We were already having troubles with the car since first buying it that they were supposed to have taken care of. They said we could pay a certain amount and get it back but they we’re very difficult to work with and didn’t want to work with us so we decided not to. Luckily my boyfriends mom let us borrow her car. It was a bit easier paying bills without making car payments but we still needed our own. His mom works also so sometimes she needs her car.

Last weekend, my boyfriend bought a car from a co-worker for $800, obviously an older car. He test drove it the day before and said it was decent, ran well, and had AC. His Co-worker promised it was in good condition and that he had been driving it the week before with no problems. Finally, we had a car!

That was short lived.

A few hours after he got the car, got everything in his name and paid for insurance we went to the grocery store. Things did seem fine, but not great. I don’t know much about cars but I kept having some worried feeling I can’t describe. The car was a manual (his favorite) instead of automatic so maybe that’s why I didn’t like the feeling.

On our way home that feeling got worse because the car kept slowing down in the middle of traffic, luckily we were right at the corner of a gas station and was able to pull inside. That’s exactly when it started really giving out, he could barely move forward and while trying we were basically jumping, my poor head and neck suffered that moment.
For a few seconds it finally started to act like it was going to work and we got halfway in the street when it stopped so suddenly and angrily. It was like it was yelling at us that it wasn’t going anywhere.

Now remember, we are halfway in the street at this point so cars are coming and wondering what the hell is going on. I know this is what they are wondering because they are literally yelling at us, not knowing we are having car troubles. A group of people across the street just watch to see what’s going to happen. Cars go around us and turn to look at us angrily, everybody is angry. They should probably look ahead before they crash and be even more angry. My boyfriend forces the car to “jump” forward so that we could park on the side of the road. At this point I was just annoyed and embarrassed.

I get worried that his co-worker is going to try and keep the money and we’ll be out another $800. My boyfriend calls him a couple of times, co-worker was trying to ensure him he never had this problem and to just let it cool off. Well, we had groceries and it was very hot out so we didn’t have time for that. After about an hour his coworker finally shows up to check the car out, can’t seem to find or fix the problem and takes us home. He said he would take it to the shop and get back wit us if we still wanted it. Do you think we wanted it still?

Apparently there was something wrong with the engine that finally broke. He had to have it scrapped…

I took this as a sign that we needed to keep the money and that we aren’t meant to have another car right now. We literally could have gotten into a bad accident that day. I feel blessed that it didn’t really give out until we made it into the gas station, out of the busy street.

I am glad we were able to get our money back with not much of a problem, and I say not much because we only got $400 back the first day since he had already deposited half towards something else. We got the other $400 a few days later. We are currently still waiting on the money back from the insurance. That’s life for ya.

Anyone else having any unfortunate things going on at the moment? Let’s bond over the crazy things life throws at us.



Short Story Saturday! “The storm…”🌧⚡️

Before I went to bed I hoped for dreams that would guide me or give me some type of insight on what was going on in my life. I watched a few general tarot readings, most mentioning spiritual things. 

We’re at my boyfriends moms apartment on the third floor. A bad storm is coming expecting to kill nearly everyone. They say to expect a flood. 

The first floor has already flooded and it’s still pouring down out. Dark clouds are covering the sky, the 2nd floor is almost ready to get flooded.  My boyfriend left to go to the store. He’s crazy right?! 

I’m waiting for him, watching out of the window afraid he won’t make it back. Back before the storm wiped him out or drowned me alone waiting. But he made it back. He made it back!

It’s a miracle but the storm isn’t over. By this time I decide to text and call loved ones to tell them that I love them and give my final goodbye because I don’t know if we will survive what is coming. I just don’t want to drown. I can’t imagine if it seems so scary. I’ve nearly drowned before but actually drown… I’m not ready. I want to survive. I want to live. Why is this happening? Is it going to end?Nothing lasts forever? 

So is this going to end good or bad?

Suddenly things slow down and someone is saying, “I’m glad the storm has passed!”

I’m confused. I still see the storm. Is it really gone?

“Yes. Look.” The voice says again. I have no idea who this person is.

I look again…

The storm has suddenly stopped and didn’t make it to the 3rd floor. Firemen are already on the scene rescuing survivors from the 2nd floor. I can’t say much about the 3rd floor. I didn’t hear of any survivors nor deaths. Is that good or bad?

I’m just glad this was only a dream. Yes, this was an actual dream I had last week! I’ve been trying to be more consistent writing my dreams down (trying to lucid dream aha) and start a cool dream journal. Of course my dreams could be better, less frightening, especially this particular one. That was pretty much a beautiful nightmare! 

Whenever I have interesting dreams I try to remember the main feelings and objects I saw so that I can look up a possible deeper meaning. In this particular dream I looked up dreaming of storms, looking out of windows, and the number 3. Here’s what I found that most related to situations and feelings in my waking life:,

To see a storm in your dream signifies some overwhelming struggle, shock, loss or catastrophe in your waking life. The storm also represents unexpressed fears or emotions, such as anger, rage, turmoil, etc. To dream of expecting a storm represents feelings about potential conflict or arguments. You may feel that telling someone something unpleasant is going to cause a fight or cause serious problems. Anticipating trouble. On a more positive note, the storm symbolizes your rising spirituality. A storm may also reflect rapid change or progress. Caring about nothing or no one else as you move forward in a situation. 

To dream of looking out a window represents insight into what’s happening or your outlook for the future. Seeing ahead or what you feel is going to happen. It may also reflect your hopes for what is about to come. Negatively, dreaming about looking out a window may reflect expectations about the future that are based on fear, anxiety, or non-objective perspective.

The number 3 in a dream represents creation or making something happen. Your plans, goals, or intentions are coming to life. Alternatively, the number 3 may reflect a creative process or chaos. There may be unpredictability in your life. 


What do you think? Do you believe in dreams having deeper meanings? Does your dreams relate to your waking life? Have you ever looked up what your dreams meant? Do you like this for a story? I have a few more dreams I’m planning to use for Short Story Saturday:)

Let’s talk! Comment below💕

Short Story Saturday: Izabelle’s Edition🐾💗

Is this thing on??

Oh HISS! Yeah it is okay. Hi. Meow😻 My name is Izabelle. Many you humans might remember me from Fun Friday #6 that my human mom posted when she first brought me to her home. Humans live in homes, not outside or in cages that’s what I’ve learned. Mom has proved you humans to be good, I love her and her companion. They are both really nice to me but mom is the nicest.

I’m told this is supposed to be a story because many you humans like reading them. So I will meow my favorites and one not so favorite times shared with mom. I hope you will like them. Mom says she hopes so too. Humans say things, they don’t meow, something I also learned. But sometimes mom meows back to me, she must think it’s adorable. I have no idea what she is trying to communicate. Okay, this just in- she’s being a copy cat… I’m a little confused too. I’ll just get back to the story.

One of my favorite times with mom is when I’m sleeping, especially next to her or under her cover. I sleep a lot.

I sleep on moms legs why she blogs in bed sometimes.

I also sleep on moms comfy cat shoes sometimes.

I also love lots of lovin💗

I love grooming myself

I also love eating and playing but mom doesn’t have any pictures of that yet. She does have videos of me playing on YouTube. Now all the world can see me having fun!

I also like checking the piggies out, that’s what mom calls them. I don’t really know what they are but they’re cool. I just watch them or lay close by. Sometimes I sniff their bums or noses but mom always says I can’t be too close or not for long times.
This is me and Hazel:

I think she kind of looks like me so I had to check her out a little more. Then I decided she’s okay and lay next to her. Mom says I better keep that paw away.

The one time I don’t like so much is when mom went out to watch the sunset and I had to stay inside. She doesn’t stay out long but I want to come too. She thinks I might jump off the balcony because I’m very curious. I meow for her to come back in and it works every time! Humans, if you want something really bad meow for it and you get it. I learned that. But you may get pictures taken of you like this:

So keep that in mind. Everything comes with a price you humans say.

Other than wanting to follow mom out life is pretty good. Thank you for reading my story I don’t know if it’s great. Is your life as good as mine? Do any you humans like anything I like? Leave comments for us to read and answer😻

Short Story Saturday! “My 1st love/heartbreak”❤️💔

Hey everyone! How’s your weekend going so far??

Mine is going to be a bit busy but I wanted to get SSS posted so I wouldn’t be worrying about it later. Today’s story is a true story, the story of my first love/first heart break.

The reason I’m telling both is because it was the same guy. You can read, or you can listen to my audio recording of the story. I’m still working on this, I’m not perfect I mess up so It’s pretty long. If you have 20 minutes to spare, have a listen:) My first love/heartbreak.

Now let’s get into it!

This happened freshman year of high school. I’ll call him Charles for the story. That’s not his real name but I’m not hear to drop identities.

Anyway, Charles and I went to the same middle school but we never spoke back then. Honestly I don’t think we really noticed each other. We went to separate high schools but had a mutual friend. One day we were texting (my friend and I) and she tells me that Charles wants my number he wants to talk. I guess she told him she was talking to me or something? I can’t remember but this was basically a set up because she was way too excited lol she wanted us to like each other and be together so bad.

But I allowed her to give my number to see where exactly things were going.
I can’t remember how those first texts went but I do know that we instantly clicked. We would text all day and night, laughing and smiling literally. At that moment, I never wanted to end the bond. It was rare for me because I’ve always been so shy and reserved. I was still shy with him, just not nearly as much.
The problem was when the feelings came. He actually had a girlfriend at the time but told me he grew feelings for me. He told me they were always arguing and she had another boyfriend or something. I don’t know. (She was a grade below us. They went to separate schools also) It was just too much going on and crazy! I told him I didn’t want to be involved in that type of drama. If he was going to be with her, be with her with no feelings for me. Even though that would hurt.

Honestly I hoped they would finally break up, I was a teenage stalker stalking both of their MySpace pages and neither one seemed to be happy with the other. There was no reason for that to carry on.
She eventually wrote me a message! Yes, a bold girl she was lol. In that message she told me she knows about Charles and I, and that I shouldn’t get my hopes up because they’re only taking a short break. Wow!
I wasn’t rude in my reply, I didn’t have to reply at all but I basically wished the best for them.
They officially broke up shortly after. Don’t ask me, I don’t know what happened. Maybe he was upset at her contacting me? Isn’t that how it usually goes? Or maybe she was the one too upset.
We didn’t get together right away. I was happy that he wasn’t attached to someone else anymore but I had to be sure. I would feel like a fool if he left me to get back with her.
In the end we were both made fools.
After a couple of months talking, he finally made things official. I had been ready longer I was just waiting for him.
I remember I was on the bus on my way to school when I got the message. That was the best day of freshman year for me lol I probably annoyed my best friend talking so much about him.
The months were full of laughter and happiness. My heart was feeling something and I thought it was love. Apparently we both did. He said it first. We even had our own little way of expressing how much, we would say “I love you 5ever” corny right? Back then it was the cutest thing ever in my mind. We had a ton of memories like this I guess you could call them couple insiders?
Since we didn’t go to the same school and I had a strict parent and aunt we had to see each other on weekends, at the skating rink. I would go with my best friend and meet him there. She wasn’t a 3rd wheel because she was very popular, she always knew someone or had someone with her plus I stayed with her majority of the time. I never learned how to skate and I’m not much of a dancer so sometimes Charles would be out dancing and skating and we’d be watching and talking. I remember him coming over to the wall to kiss me once and then going back to the dance floor. I also remember slow dancing with him there which was my favorite moment we shared. I didn’t want that night to end and I didn’t want us to end. I have a cousin who went to his high school so sometimes we would write letters to each other and she was our mail delivery lady lol. The idea was mine so that we could keep in touch closer than the phone on weekdays. I know that sounds kind of, not cool but I really love and appreciate her for that!

We both kept our letters for years! I lost my collection of his first. I was so sad! He kept his collection under his mattress and they got ruined while cleaning one day.
Puppy love.
It did come to an end. On his birthday!

This is where I talk about my first heart break…
It was 12 AM and I had just sent him a very happy, loving happy bday message. You’d think my response would be a thank you or something but no. Instead I got “I’m sorry but this isn’t working out.” Something along those lines.
Wth??? Out of nowhere? It had to be a joke or a dream is what I thought. I kept questioning him in total disbelief. But he never said just kidding and I never woke up from a nightmare. It was reality. He was really that cruel.
My poor teenage heart.💔 I went outside so upset (remember it’s after midnight) called my best friend to tell her what had happened and she was just saying “omg that’s messed up, you better not be crying” etc…

I wasn’t crying but I wanted to. I was in shock and disbelief still so I couldn’t.
Literally a few days, maybe a week goes by and he has a NEW girlfriend!!

His excuse was we didn’t feel like a couple because I was shy and he couldn’t see me that much. Wow. My best friend was probably more upset than I was, she actually wrote the new girl! I won’t mention the words she had for her because they weren’t nice obviously. She was just being a friend to me.
Even when he was with the new girl I didn’t feel things were right. We seemed so close, didn’t argue, he seemed so into me I couldn’t understand. It confused me more because he didn’t cut me off, we still talked. It was hard on me but I had hope. A couple of months go by then he told me he wasn’t even attracted to her, that his best friend made him break up with me so they could date sisters!

How can someone make you do that? Especially if you “love” that person.
I didn’t know what to think or believe but they broke up so I thought he may have been telling the truth. Unfortunately I had already moved on and my new relationship was already longer than the one with him. All the feelings came rushing back, if they were ever gone but I decided I couldn’t leave someone who hasn’t left me for someone that already has.
Charles said I caused him to have trust issues because I told him we’d get back together I just needed time to figure things out. Well. Things happen, things change. He should know that.
The new relationship lasted almost 5 years and Charles was still around trying for at least half of that time.
I have no hard feelings for him. Things just weren’t meant to be and if I had found my soulmate that young, what would I have really got to experience and learn? We probably would have had problems or broken up eventually. I know it’s possible but I just feel like you haven’t experienced life at that age so you don’t really know exactly what you want, especially out of a partner for the rest of your life. We actually talked a few years ago in a friendly manner but It’s true…. You don’t know what you have until it’s gone. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side, and you shouldn’t take things or people for granted. Because you won’t always be able to get it back when you miss it or when you realize your mistakes. If you have someone you really love and care about hold onto them💕

Song used in audio: Aaliyah – The One I Gave My Heart To

How old were you when you experienced your first love/heartbreak? Let me know in the comments. Also, do you like the new image? I have a few I made, i’m still deciding on which one but I think it’s my favorite so far.

Short Story Saturday✨

Who’s got a shoulder when I need to cry
I feel restless and I don’t know why
Cry for help, but still feel alone
Like a motherless child along way from home
Lord I’m lost I can’t find my way
I’m dealing with the struggles in my day to day
My soul is weak and I wanna be strong
I try to run away but I’ve been running too long…
Motherless Child lyrics

Everyone has a mother, that’s how we’re all here. That’s why many of us are getting ready to celebrate Mother’s Day.

I haven’t been able to celebrate properly since my mother has been away, out of my life since I was about 3 from what I can remember. She was trapped in a high that could not accept motherhood. I always hoped some miracle would happen, where she would come back for me or we would meet. But if we met would she notice me? I probably wouldn’t recognize her. It became a dream of mine to meet my mother and have her love, and for that I would give anything up.

(Today’s story is not fiction. This is a part of my life. Listen to the songs that inspired me to tell this portion of my story and the poem I wrote: Kehlani – The LetterLabrinth – JealousJohn Legend – Motherless Child) *I highly recommend listening to these songs if you haven’t already. Especially if you have a similar story*

Sophomore year a miracle happened but I didn’t have to give up anything. I rarely get to see my mothers side of the family and I barely know them. I’ve only met my uncle, my grandparents, and 2 cousins so it’s always nice when I do get to see them. My uncle contacted me and my older brother D, (I’ll just call him by the first initial of his name) D is the brother that was in foster care with me, but had to stay when my father got me out because we only share the same mother. We were so close when we were younger. Sadly things aren’t the same…

Back to the story, we were informed we would be picked up to go spend some time with him and our grandparents. For some reason, I felt like it was more to it than that. I had this really good feeling in my heart like something great was about to happen. I was right.

When we arrived at my grandparents house, there was a woman standing outside on the porch waiting. I couldn’t recognize her but I guess my heart could? I felt it and knew in my heart who that woman was. I got out of the car and we basically went to each other with open arms. Before we got out the car my uncle said “We have a surprise. That’s your mama,” but like I said, I already knew. It was supposed to be more of a surprise for me because my brother had a little more contact with her than I ever did. I guess because he is oldest so it was easier for him to understand things. She instantly started to cry and apologize for not being there all those years, and for doing the things she did that kept her away. She made sure to tell me she loves me and always has. She was just sick and she wished she could take it all back. I was never angry at her and I couldn’t cry because I was just too happy and shocked that the moment was even happening. It could have very well been a dream.

I thought things would change that day, but this time my thoughts were wrong. She disappeared and I didn’t hear from her again until I was about 20 years old. I had been looking for her, asking around. Calling my uncle asking him. No one knew where she was or had heard from her in a while, but then my uncle calls back and says they’ve found out she’s in the hospital with pneumonia. He gave me the hospital name and some other information and we hang up. I immediately call the hospital but the nurse tells me she is sleeping at the moment so call back in a little while. I believe she gave me a specific time to call back, I’m not sure but I’ll go with that. I called back at that specific time and finally, I heard my mothers voice. She told me the nurse told her that her daughter called (I’m her only daughter) and she felt such a blessing over her and hoped I would call back. We talked for a while and I made plans to visit, it felt like that same miracle all over again. Only this time maybe things would turn out better, maybe the timing was better. Maybe meeting under the circumstances would bring a change in her. I don’t know. I just always have high hopes.

Finally arriving to her hospital room and hugging her again only made those hopes higher. Sadly, I was wrong again. We kept in touch a while longer than the first time, but not long enough. This time she was gone right before Mother’s Day…

I can’t explain what I felt then, but it was much worse than any pain I felt before meeting her. I even wondered if I should just give up because it would always end like this. Everyone told me she would make promises she couldn’t keep. Maybe I should have listened…but I can’t. I can’t give up on her or my hopes of having that mother daughter relationship I’ve always wanted and deserved. Maybe the 3rd time we meet will be the charm.

Letter To My Mother Away

Mother you’re away still 

I’ve never been able to celebrate with you for Mother’s Day,

or any other occasion.

Every year I watch all the other sons and daughters with their mothers

I tell my aunt Happy Mother’s Day! But it’s just not the same…

She has her own children 

Like you have your own

But you left yours to be all alone

High off life without me

It couldn’t have been easy 

But it was harder being low and sober 

You needed it but you didn’t need 

Me as a baby, and the thought of you leaving

The pain makes me queasy

And I blame you for many things

The root of my pain 

But I never hated you

I still love you 

Even when I barely know you

It’s such a shame

How do you even remember me?

You told me you didn’t remember my little brothers name

But I still love you

I was still happy I could be there with you for a moment 

and you were okay

It felt like a miracle 

I was in the hospital only months before from that car crash

Then there I was 

Walking through hospital doors 

To meet you alive

Smiling and laughing 

Giving me advice for the first time

Promising we’d keep in touch this time for the second time 

It was the best day of my life

I thought I’d finally have you in my life

And I did for a while

Then Mother’s Day came around

You were no where to be found…

Mother away

It’s been about 2 years since then

I haven’t heard from you since

But I’ve been told you’ve been seen and you’ve been asking about me

Is it true?

But if you really wanted me 

I know you could find me 

just like I found you

Still I love you

And I have hope

Broken hope 

That has not died

And If it’s not too late

When you come around

(Please don’t wait 

to come around)

I’ll be by your side